


Tea in a microwave is perfectly acceptable, thank you very much.

by Fangirl_on_fire



Series: AUs, AUs, and AUs [1]
Category: The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - No Powers, Calculus, Coffee, College AU, Fluff, M/M, Meet-Cute, Steve has a cat, Tea, Tony breaks into steve's apartment, sarah the cat, steve doesn't like coffee, tony doesn't like tea
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-12
Updated: 2017-08-12
Packaged: 2018-12-14 10:13:04
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,224
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11781012
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Fangirl_on_fire/pseuds/Fangirl_on_fire
Summary: Steve's just having another boring night in his college dormitory when Tony Stark jumps through his window, breaks his favorite mug, and insults his tea.“You broke into my apartment drunk thinking it was your friend’s house and I should call the cops but my cat kinda likes you so we’re good” AU





	Tea in a microwave is perfectly acceptable, thank you very much.

It was just a normal night for Steve, doing his homework while listening to his favorite playlist, one that Bucky constantly made fun of him of because "that music is over a century old, Steve, get with the times!". He was pretty bored, but that was nothing new. He was supposed to be doing calculus, but he had ended up doodling flowers in the margin of the paper. The professor was probably used to Steve's idle doodles anyhow. 

Steve sighed, frustrated, and stood up, going over to his kitchen cupboard and taking out a large coffee mug that Bucky had got him for his birthday that read 'all-American star'. Bucky had said that it was ironic, considering Steve never drank coffee and, according to him, American blood was 79% coffee. Steve had simply told him that that wasn't the correct definition of irony, but Bucky had ignored him. Steve always used the mug for tea, anyway, so it didn't really matter how many times Bucky insisted that he was disrespecting America by drinking tea. 

He took a teabag out of the drawer next to the oven, and placed it on the counter. Then, he filled the mug with water and stuck it in the microwave for three minutes. When the time was up, he took it out and put the teabag in. Peggy always yelled at him whenever she saw him making tea that way, insisting that "microwave tea isn't real tea, Steve, how dare you insult the wondrous creation that is tea like this!". Again, it didn't really matter to Steve, because why bother buying a kettle when he already had something that could heat up the water just fine?

When the tea was finally ready, he placed it on the windowsill to cool down, and sat back down on the sofa, leaning back. He didn't go back to calculus, but it was a compulsory course so he was stuck doing it at 12 in the night when ordinarily he would have been asleep by then. 

He felt something fuzzy on his legs so he looked down to see his cat Sarah happily rubbing her face against his legs. He smiled and bent down to pick her up and place her on his lap, stroking her and getting a lapful of loose fur. He would clean it off later; it's not like anyone would see it now, right?

Just as Steve was about to get up to take his tea, a figure outside his window wrenched it open and vaulted in, knocking his favorite mug off the shelf where it broke on the ground and babbling at a million miles per hour. 

"Rhodey, Rhodey, -oops, sorry about that mug, I didn't know you drank tea, how dare you disrespect America like this- I think I just discovered that energy source I've been working on, you know, the one I told you about, but I blew up the left wing of my house in the process and Howard's about to kill me but I told him that I made a renewable energy source so he kinda calmed down a little but it finally worked, Rhodey, it finally worked! What do you-" The figure, who Steve now saw was a guy around his age, cut himself off and looked at Steve blankly. "You're not Rhodey"

Steve would have come up with a witty comeback, but he was distracted with the fact that his favorite mug was now broken. "My mug!", he wailed, running over to the broken mug and cradling the broken pieces. He looked over at the guy and narrowed his eyes. "You murdered it. You murdered my favorite mug!" 

"Sorry, I'll buy you a new one" The guy said unapologetically, walking over and plonking himself down on Steve's sofa and helping himself to the packet of doritos that Steve had opened. Steve was about to call the cops, but then he noticed that the guy had leaned down to pet Sarah, who was purring contently. The guy picked her up and placed her on his lap, continuing his stroking. Sarah pawed at him gently, and Steve stared in disbelief. It had taken him three months to get Sarah used to him, and even longer to get her to love him, and it took this guy all of three seconds?! 

Oh, this was bad. 

"Uh- what are you doing?" Steve asked uncertainly. "In my house, I mean. What are you doing in my house." 

"Chilling. Eating", the guy shrugged. "Petting this very cute cat, and staring at her very cute owner." 

Okay, Steve was even more confused now. "Are you trying to flirt your way out of this? Man, you broke into my apartment in the middle of the night and broke my favorite mug. And spilled my tea!" 

"I already said sorry!" The guy huffed. "What's your name, Captain Handsome?" 

Steve didn't know whether to say his name or protest against the nickname. "Steve. Steve Rogers. Not Captain Handsome!" 

"Whatever you say, cap" The guy shrugged. "I'm Tony Stark"

Steve put down his phone. Sarah liked Tony, so he probably wasn't an axe-murderer here to kill Steve or a rogue coming to steal his calculus homework. Steve still didn't know what to say, so he decided to take the polite approach. "Would you like some tea?" 

Tony sat up straight and glared at Steve. "How dare you offer me the bane of America, our Kryptonite, the substance that freezes our coffee blood while putting up a middle finger!" 

"Tea just wants to make people happy!" Steve defended. "It's a pure cinnamon roll, too good for this world, too pure!" 

"Don't you have any coffee?" Tony whined. Steve shook his head. "Fine. I'll have some tea. But only if it's caffeinated!" 

"Sure thing" Steve answered. He brought out another mug, one that read 'World's best mom'. A gag gift from Natasha, who always protested that Steve mothered them too much. Just as Steve started heating up the water in the microwave, Tony let out a deafening screech. Steve spun around in terror and saw Tony staring at him with wide, horrified eyes. 

"Who heats up water in their microwave!" He yelled. "Why would anyone do that! The whole point of kettles is to avoid doing that! Hell, I'll buy you a new kettle! Just don't torture my eyes and taste buds with the taste of fake tea!" 

Steve groaned and rubbed his temples. "Tony, do you want tea or not?" 

"Not anymore!" Tony glared at him. "How do you live like this?" 

"I live just fine, thank you very much!" Steve retorted. Tony stood up, making Sarah leap off with a sound of betrayal, and picked up Steve's phone, ignoring Steve's noise of protest. He opened Steve's contact list, and entered in his own number. At least, the number was presumably his own. 

"Here's my number, cap. You clearly need someone to help you make your choices in life!" Tony said. Then, he winked. "Call me, handsome" 

Steve froze for a moment, then replied "As long as you don't insult my tea, I definitely will" 

Now it was Tony's turn to look surprised. Then, he grinned. "Oh, I like you" 

Sarah walked over to Tony again, demanding to be petted. Tony smiled, and bent down to pet her. 

Okay, maybe this wasn't so bad. 


End file.
